Why Bullies Will Never Win

I travelled up to Manchester last night for a meeting regarding a TV pilot. I don’t know Manchester that well but was fortunate enough to catch up with an old work colleague form several years ago. We made our way to a nice but not too extravagant bar for a few cold beers and a bite to eat.

It was one of those bars where the staff looked immaculate. The sort of waitresses that look like Leona Lewis and the bar staff like Abercrombie & Fitch models. One of the waitresses looked what many would define as “normal”. There was little striking about her appearance, tall, glasses, polite manner and she was kind and courteous throughout the time I was there.

In the corner of this bar were several business men obviously out on a corporate evening. They were the sort of businessmen that I tend to avoid going near, loud, obnoxious and the conversation that was obvious to everyone focussed solely on how much their annual bonuses would be this year. I would say from appearance they were in their mid 30’s yet looked ten years older, overweight and obviously unhealthy.

I was present at this bar for around two hours yet in that time this poor waitress was subjected to the level of harassment that nobody deserves. They were calling her names that I don’t want to describe. I could only tolerate so much and went to speak to the management. After speaking to the manager I was rather stunned to hear his reaction of “Don’t worry mate she gets this kind of thing all the time”.

Excuse me?!

Just because she had a normal appearance she has to be subject to verbal abuse in her place of work? Since when did any management use that as an acceptable argument? Of course myself and my friend could not tolerate this for much longer and were about to go up to the men serving the abuse when my friends girlfriend beat us to it.

What happened next can only really be described as being like a teacher telling off a crowd of naughty schoolboys. Lisa, my friend’s partner, laid into these men with so much verbal force and energy I think they turned white with fear. She gave them an absolute hammering and I was rather stunned when the men paid their bar tab and then left. I’m not sure what happened to the waitress as she seemed to have left, so if here shift was over or she finally had enough I guess I will never find out.

During my adolescence I was subject to being bullied in school but it only made me more determined and stronger to succeed in life and now when I sometimes get friend requests on Facebook I somehow take pride in realising that the drive and determination that they forced on me as a child has provided my life with far better rewards than theirs ever will.

Bullies are just people who are trying to fill their own empty lives with a sense of purpose and that is done by taking it out on those who are lesser than them in some capacity. My advice on anyone who is being bullied is that these people are weaker and less than you. Don’t take it; don’t be afraid to speak to someone in authority that can help. The example of the manager above is a bad one, but there are always people who can help.

Bullies are weak, shallow and empty people and always will be. YOU are a hundred times the person that they ever will be. You have one life to live, don’t let those bullies keep you down.